Women Equality: Hard path with cactus of Society and male dominancy.
It is easily said than done. Equality for women in this country is a tough task to achieve. Ours is a male-dominated society. They mostly try to suppress the budding of growth in women. The problem is not just of equality in status but the equality of thoughts which should come from within, be it a man or a woman.
The traitor of this inequality is not the privileged gender, some might blame me for this, that how a woman who herself is at receiving end can be the cause of this curse. Just turn your head and look at the negative attitude of the women towards themselves. They always found them hanging between the father and the husband. Though they are not solely responsible yes they are somewhat responsible for this misery.
Our laws and rules are not gender neutral. It differentiates between gender based on their physical and mental ability. It was not permissible for a woman to get a commandant role in defence forces but with the recent intervention of the supreme court now it is permissible. Gates of Sainik school were closed for girls for nearly 75 years of independence. Now a girl child is permitted to study there, just think it takes 75 years to allow them to study at a government-funded school. Girls were allowed to write NDA exams by this year only. There are a plethora of laws and rules which put the women at disadvantage.
Religious laws are highly male-dominated. They keep a woman always in the custody of their father and after marriage, the master is her husband. Women have no choice but to follow the instructions. Social dogmas are the final nail in the coffin which locks a woman. It is not just doing house chores and looking for the child and family. If one looks at the broader things. These things are nothing in front of them. Still, there is an apprehension of the parents to send their girl child for better education opportunities. Not allowing them formal education and good higher education is pushing them into a vicious cycle of dependence and social misery. Society accepts most of the things from women from birth itself. She should not speak loud, She should know all the household work, she should dress properly, she should talk less, she should not go outside, she should come early before evening, the list is everlasting.
One of these thoughts I experience recently. I was riding and suddenly a girl overtake me. Inner me calls me, look a girl overtakes you. I started to speed up but suddenly the thought struck my mind. Why have you not reacted when a male did the same? After reaching home, I thought about this and conclude that we are always made to experience these things in our daily life. Our mind is well trained to not accept a girl over a boy. In between this, I encountered other thoughts that it is always a girl put to physical parameters of height, weight, and colour in case of a matrimonial relationship. If a girl has more height than a boy, It would not be accepted in any case.
Marriage is the biggest burden and responsibility of Indian parents. It is a common saying ” Beti badi ho gayi hai” “shadi ki umar ho gayi hai beti ki”. We never hear the opposite. This thinking is again tightening the screw of male dominancy. The wish of the girl had no place. Even if she wants to study, become self-dependent or just doesn’t want to marry. Her feelings have no place here. She has to marry the boy that her father brings. And if she tries to resist there would be a direct question on her character. The next word is ” yahi sanskar diya tha”.
“Sanskar” and “Izzat” is mostly for her. Male counterparts are free from this thought. ‘YES’ of the female is always the base for respect. The time she starts denying or resiting there will be a storm of “kaha muh dikhayege” “log kahenge inki beti kaise hai” “hamre ghar ke sanskar ye ni hai”. These all work as a burial ground of her thoughts and feeling.
These feelings of differntiation is growing inside the person from the day he become conscious. We learn it from the family and society. Knowingly or unknowingly we are burning the thread of equality daily through our actions by our way of interacting with females. They are not the “Bechara” class. Treat them the way you treat yourself and a male. Try to kill the discrimination from within and then support this hypocrisy of equality.
Thanking you
Divyanshu Singh
(Views expressed are personal)
